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it broke open.  I m sorry I don t seem to be able to get that
lesson. It s a tough one for me to grasp. All this? He looked
around and used his free hand to indicate the house and lawn.
The pool with its now placid water.  It seems like a fantasy. I
can t even believe I m sitting here. I wake up every day and try
to be the me that we created together just so this dream this
relationship with you and the money and the house so they ll
never go away.
 That s why I bake. Kit s murmured observation made no
 That s why I bake. Kit s murmured observation made no
sense, and Jeremy said so. Kit smiled.  I bake because I want to
feel at home with you. To create something more real than what I
was given. A life and a sense of purpose. He quirked a shy
smile and ducked his head.  I feed you to feed the relationship. I
want to take care of you the way you want to be taken care of.
It s what I know how to do. Cook. Make a place for you to feel
safe and well fed.
Jeremy kept frowning at him, unable to get the stupid look
off his face though he thought he should probably try. Kit was
opening up to him. He should do something more than look at
him like he d grown six arms.
 I saw your pain when you left your shit by the curb that
day we met. Kit squeezed his hand once and sat back.  I didn t
really understand it, but I watched you eat that night. Saw how
you tried not to look like you were shoveling food in your face.
 Oh shit. Jeremy closed his eyes, mortified.  Is that why
you asked me to stay? Why you gave me clothes and the agent
and everything?
Kit grinned.  Nah. I just wanted to get in your pants.
Jeremy laughed, surprised at the humor bursting through his
embarrassment.  You re a puzzle, that s for damned sure, Kit.
So you want to feed me& 
 I don t know how it started, but at some point, home
became you. You became home. Real home, like this place
isn t. Kit spared a sour glance for the surrounding splendor.  I
isn t. Kit spared a sour glance for the surrounding splendor.  I
didn t want you to leave. So, I kept taking care of you. Then you
didn t need me anymore. The cooking was all I had left. For me
and for you. At least you had to eat.
 So why not go with Andy? He thinks he needs you.
Jeremy s thoughts took a rancorous turn.  You re equals in the
kitchen, but he worships you.
Jamming his hands in his pockets, Kit stretched out his legs
and slid down in the chair.  He wanted to own my fame. I don t
get that. The guy has more than enough for himself. Why be
obsessed with me?
Jeremy shrugged, pleased to see Kit saw the difference
between love and obsession.  You re pretty magnetic when
you re fired up about something, Kit. Baking is one of those
things.
 I like film too. I feel at home on a set. Just not when I
don t have the right role. Kit snorted.  I bake for fun, but I
enjoy work. Film is work.
 If I hadn t walked in&  Jeremy brought them back to the
essential question. He had to know what would ve happened.
What, exactly, he d interrupted.
 No. Scowling, Kit snapped his head up.  I wouldn t
have. I was about to tell him to get lost. I think he wanted to
claim his sexual identity through me or some other bullshit but
didn t know how. I d done it, and he thought by extension,
putting a claim on me might help him find his way too. I don t
honestly know if that s the truth, but I do know I wasn t going to
honestly know if that s the truth, but I do know I wasn t going to
give him what he wanted.
 I saw the hard-on you had for him.
 I never said I didn t think he was hot. Kit grumbled the
admission, and squinted up at the too-blue sky.  I just want
more than hot. I want the full package. I want you.
A modicum of doubt remained, but Jeremy nodded.
Hugging himself, he asked,  What about the bakery?
Kit looked down again. Appearing to wage an internal
struggle, he remained silent for a long time. Jeremy waited him
out. Across the property someone started a lawn mower. Its
hum became the white noise to Jeremy s thoughts. If Kit decided
to stay in business with Andy, Jeremy wasn t sure he could take
it. Every time Kit left for a meeting, Jeremy d be tempted to
follow. If only to make certain Andy didn t try to stake a claim.
 I ll sell my half to Andy. Kit sank farther down in the
chair.
He might ve said what Jeremy wanted to hear, but his
shoulders, now high around his ears, and the black scowl on his
face? Those told a different story. He d give up the bakery
because he didn t want to give up Jeremy, but he d resent it
forever. Eventually the decision would come between them.
 No. Jeremy stood and drew his chair closer to Kit s.
When he sat, he leaned forward, elbows on his knees, so he
could look Kit in the eye.  We ll figure something else out.
Maybe we can buy him out.
Maybe we can buy him out.
Kit blinked, the scowl falling from his face as he seemed to
consider the possibility.  I can t make it work without him.
 Bullshit. Jeremy echoed Greg s earlier sentiment and
cracked a smile.  I ve tasted your cupcakes. I spent six extra [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]